Casual Dating: Two Straws and One Lemonade

Our little town, Manipal, mirrors those youthful pages off the prospectuses circulated by universities as bait for prospective students. The time we spend in this little town is defining, formative of our personalities and career alike. Here is when and where we can make mistakes as we experiment with people and processes.

With such opportunity as this on our platters, and the atmosphere charged with elusive hormones, it is natural that we constantly look for someone to share the inexplicably energetic time with. It is natural that our roving eyes latch onto certain faces that we may associate with the word  ‘pleasant’. Or, it could be one of our very own batch-mates with an intriguing personality. Whatever the case may be, approach them. Not for marriage, or with a long term relationship in mind, but a casual date.

In college, seldom will we come across people who are actually looking for something long term. Face it, we’ll be scattered across the world during our post-graduation days and most people will guarantee that long distance is not the way you want to go.  Enjoy the time you have with this person you like, instead of worrying about the future you MIGHT have with them.

There is something magical about drinking lemonade from the same glass or holding hands and just sauntering down a street. If you’re like me, who needs all the lemonade in the glass, go for bowling! Movies are generally a bad idea because it’s essentially watching someone else, ignoring your date, and not talking at all for an entirety of 2 and a half hours. Sharing popcorn and Pepsi is just not the same. Instead, go on a walk to End Point. It’s cheap, healthy, and intimate. Also, End Point is pretty dark and deserted in its farthest reaches, making discretion possible. Seriously, there is no point splurging on a first date. It’s a sunk cost if you don’t feel the need for a second date and of course, let’s not forget the universal truth that college students are always broke.

Somewhere along the way, we raised the expectations we have of people. There are people who look at an individual as a genetic pool and immediately think of things they could harness while making babies. It’s perfectly okay to imagine that his height will ensure tall kids and that her sharp nose will counter your own bulbous one. However, before deciding the breeding process, there is also the grave matter of rearing. It is imperative to realize that a date does not equal to being in a relationship, and neither do five dates. You might end up being great friends after a date.

A relationship is a deeper understanding of the characteristics of the other person and putting up with their flaws. On the other hand, a date is for fun, with the sole purpose of getting to know another person and broadening your horizons and maybe, learning something in the process. Don’t go for a date with a preformed idea, instead go with the flow. Easier said than done, LOWER YOUR EXPECTATIONS. It protects you from a lot of disappointments. You’re out on a date, not a mission to prove something. Take your time, get to know this person and feel out the way ahead. Let the sparks fly. Decide whether a second date is something you both want.  A date needs to be a reflection of how you feel, and how comfortable you can be with your counterpart. It does not need to be a show where you strut about, making your presence felt. Bottom line, casual dating should be your new buzzword.

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