Colors Of Love – Green

You remind me of a time when I used to be happy,

Perhaps that is why when I see you, I still smile sometimes,

You mistake it for adoration, the slight circling of hands, scaling your hair behind that follows,

Your lips stretch to free your teeth as you turn against me,

I always wish it is towards something,

Away from me.

Yet I want to keep seeing that back,

disfaded and demeaning,

Turnt towards me.

Succeeding, recurring, luring,

puncturing my throbbing gall,

Till I’m bludgeoned by the scant within.

 

The hurt fills with the billionth ray of heat that swallows my nightmares early morning; it begins till it brims out into between us,

It drowns me, and my anguished splashes burn you too,

It’s no less scathing than those green noxious acids lined up in labs,

But every morning, after push and shove,

You’re still as clean as the light that simmers off of you,

The same mornings, I’m left, melted by that green around,

Perhaps that is the color of this fate,

That you and I share,

You refusing to hurl down and me,

Refusing to sight up.

 

Here lies the beginning and end,

Of the balance between us,

The beginning of romantic equality, cocooned by a similar start,

Two naive college hearts melding powerlessly,

And the end of a morose disparity,

A star and a junkie,

Preserving fame and wrecking rehabs.

 

 

Yet, it’s sweet when the luxurious engine rolls in the night,

And I panic my pills into a flush,

Heels creak up a lonesome rosewood,

And you enter bleeding in fake courtesies.

I see that hint of green before the night caves in your eyes,

When my feeble yearning ones give you the majesty those decorated spotlights fail to,

Sating your pitless urge for assurance.

I reach out my trembling hands,

Knowing my lowness gives your life its biggest high,

I dissolve my fears in the power I choose to give you.

 

But when you do choose to face me,

My heart does slow,

And the cravings do fade,

Perhaps yours too,

As you change into the cheap gown, I brought you in an archaic glory,

Your hands receive mine,

And your skin wraps around them,

Dropping the toll of decadent desires.

For once, I drain my own abyss,

And hope we remain cuddled together,

Under the shades of that past conforming green,

Two uncaring equals happy to have one another.

The shades left, and the nettled sunbeams battling them now pursued morose flowers,

The blooming green became slowly intoxicating,

Like our relationship with our own ambitions.

“Stay with me,” you whisper,

And submit to my ailing comfort,

A gist of the past throbs inside me,

As my envious touches calm you closer.

 

The trail of black continues,

Till my nightmares sink incomplete,

A new morning dwells,

With my heart in all happy remembrance,

Till I give you that misunderstood smile.

 

Written by Sidhant for MTTN 

Edited by Aarthika Srinivasan for MTTN 

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